by Pastor Michael Eaton
This Q&A series is from my book “How To Be Bless As A Christian Single." You can get a copy of the book at
What if you admire a person so much that you are afraid to say anything to that person? If it has been 5 years or more, how do you handle something like that?
“There are only three classes of people in the world,” an unknown preacher confessed. “Those who are afraid, those who do not know enough to be afraid, and those who know their Bibles.”
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2Timoth 1:7
You do not have because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures. James 4:2e-3
There is a passage in scripture that I think of when I read this question. It is a scripture that I have been determined that would not apply to me. This scripture says, “You do not have because you do not ask.” The issue it seems that you are faced with is fear. Paul wrote Timothy to say, “God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity….” There is a fear that can motivate action and there is a fear that will paralyze. Generally, the fear that we have may play a role in our destiny. While growing up, I had a fear of speaking in public. I had to overcome that fear in order to live out my destiny as a preacher.
I do not know if this woman is meant for you. However, I do know that the fear that you have is not of God. I can go as far to say that you only have a crush on this person. For if there were any Godly love the bible says, “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear,..." 1 John 4:18
Fear in this case could also mean that you have low self-esteem. If you are a Chirstian you can change your self-esteem into Christ-esteem. If you have Christ-esteem you will think of your self as an answer to prayer. You could be God's answer to this person prayer for a mate.
Or in the worse case this fear could mean you have deified this person. You have made this person a god. If so, you are involved in idolatry. You can not love a person on a petastal.
My advice than would be for you to pray about it. If you feel that God is leading you, break the ice by letting her know in a Godly way that you are interested.
Machiavelli made the notorious assertion that given the choice between love and fear, a prince ought to choose the latter. You could be making a choice right now. If I were you, I would choose love.
Also get a copy of my e-book, "How To Be Blessed As A Christian Single" at http://www.holidayhillsbaptistchurch.com/eBooks.html.